Every NIMBY’s Speech At a Public Hearing
McSweeney's Internet Tendency
Friends, neighbors, it’s good to see all of you. I know you, you know me, and just seeing all of your faces at this city council meeting reminds m...
i find this very satisfying
Alex Baca 🖤
"There has been no “Oh God, the Other is taking over and we must stop them from inflicting their strange ways on our all-American life” moment tonight. And so, I’m afraid, you have wasted all of our time."
We read 3,629 public meeting comments from 97 towns for our book. This article is perfect.
"let’s make a list of public programs that have directly benefitted me. Those are good. Now let’s make a list of public programs that benefit other people. Those are bad. That’s what small government means, after all"
"Every NIMBY's Speech at a Public Hearing"
“I’ve lived in the same house in the Elm Heights neighborhood for the past twenty years, and I just love everything about this town except for the problems that my politics have directly created.”
Cari Wade Gervin
This is the most accurate alleged satire McSweeney's has ever published. I hav heard this almost word for word many a time, and if you've ever reported on local politics, so have you.
We aren’t Tacoma. We aren’t Amherst. We aren’t Portland, Maine. Are we Scottsdale? No, we are not Our town exists in a fog of mystery & enigmatic strangeness, & nothing that happens outside city boundaries should have any bearing on how we govern or exist
"I grew up here and, after leaving for a time to go to college and start my career, returned to this town, my true home, in order to raise a family and stop time from progressing.” #NIMBY
Quite possibly the best thing I've ever read.
Rust Never Sleeps
"We aren’t Tacoma. We aren’t Amherst. We aren’t Portland, Maine. Are we Scottsdale? No, we are not. And so all this so-called “evidence” about how policies have worked in other towns simply does not apply to us. No evidence applies to us."
Dr. Sara Goldrick-Rab
“As a middle-class white man who came of age during the most profound & sustained economic boom in our nation’s history, I understand struggle. I never received anything in my life, except a world-class public education that cost virtually nothing.”
The second thing the council must understand is that subject-specific expertise built up through a lifetime of education and research doesn’t mean much unless you are also able to make exaggerated claims that stoke fear and resentment
If I haven’t convinced you yet of my point of view, this surely will: as a middle-class white Christian man who came of age during the most profound and sustained economic boom in our nation’s history, I understand struggle
“That’s what small government means, after all: the consolidation of wealth and power in the hands of those who already have those things, because the idea that in a democratic society we are all equals is dangerous and frightening to me.” —
Every NIMBY's Speech At a Public Hearing - McSweeney's Internet Tendency
'let’s make a list of public programs that have directly benefitted me. Those are good. Now let’s make a list of public programs that benefit other people. Those are bad'